We don’t talk about failure very honestly.
We dress it up as “learning”, soften it into “experience”, or pretend it’s something confident people don’t really go through. But the truth is simpler — and far more useful:
If you want progress, change, or to build something meaningful, you have to be ready to fail.
Not once.
Not neatly.
But repeatedly.
Failure isn’t the opposite of success.
It’s the terrain you have to cross to reach it.
I've "failed" a lot, and it's what led me to coaching first as a client and now as the coach.
Why Failure Is Part of Any Meaningful Life
Every worthwhile ambition asks something of you:
changing direction in your career
stepping into leadership
building a business or project
setting healthier boundaries
living more honestly
None of those things come with certainty.
If you move, you’ll misjudge something.
If you stretch, you’ll overreach.
If you try something new, you’ll get parts of it wrong.
That’s not a flaw in the process — that is the process.
Most people don’t stay stuck because they’re incapable.
They stay stuck because they’re trying to avoid failure at all costs.
They wait.
They overthink.
They polish instead of progressing.
And in doing so, they fail anyway — just more quietly.
A Strengths-Based View of Failure
Here’s where strengths-based thinking changes everything.
When you understand your strengths, you stop interpreting failure as evidence that something is “wrong” with you. Instead, you start seeing it as information.
Strengths aren’t just what you’re good at — they’re how you naturally approach the world:
When a strategy fails, it’s often not because you failed — it’s because a particular strength was:
For example:
High drive without pause can lead to burnout
Strong analysis without action can lead to stagnation
Big vision without structure can collapse under its own weight
Understanding your strengths gives you language for what’s happening, rather than spiralling into self-criticism.
Failure becomes feedback, not identity.
Why Failure Feels So Personal
Failure hits harder when you don’t understand yourself.
Without that understanding, every setback gets interpreted as:
“I’m not cut out for this”
“I should have known better”
“Everyone else seems to manage this fine”
That’s when people retreat, second-guess, or abandon things that matter to them.
This is why so many capable people:
leave good ideas unfinished
step back just as momentum is building
settle for comfort instead of alignment
Not because they can’t succeed — but because they don’t have support while navigating uncertainty.
This Is Where Coaching Matters
Coaching isn’t about preventing failure.
It’s about helping you move through it without losing yourself.
A good coach helps you:
separate what happened from who you are
reflect without catastrophising
adjust course without giving up
learn without self-punishment
When failure happens — and it will — coaching provides:
perspective when emotions are loud
structure when things feel messy
accountability when avoidance creeps in
encouragement without false reassurance
It gives you a place to process, make sense, and decide your next move — rather than reacting or retreating.
Failure Is Easier When You’re Not Doing It Alone
Most people try to navigate failure in isolation.
They replay conversations.
They overanalyse decisions.
They doubt themselves quietly.
Coaching interrupts that loop.
It gives you:
a thinking partner
a mirror for your patterns
language for what’s really going on
support between sessions, not just during them
You don’t need someone to tell you what to do.
You need someone who can help you stay in motion when things wobble.
Being Ready to Fail Is a Skill
Readiness to fail isn’t about recklessness.
It’s about resilience.
It’s knowing:
That confidence doesn’t come from positive thinking.
It comes from self-understanding, reflection, and support.
Why Foundations Exists
This is exactly why I start all coaching with Foundations.
Foundations is a 4-week coaching experience designed to help you:
understand how you lead yourself
recognise your strengths and pressure patterns
make sense of past failures without judgement
build a grounded way forward
It’s not about fixing you.
It’s about equipping you to navigate uncertainty, setbacks, and ambition with clarity and self-trust.
Because failure doesn’t mean you stop.
It means you refine.
The Invitation
If you’re pursuing something that matters — and it feels uncomfortable — that’s not a warning sign.
That’s growth asking you to stay present.
Get ready to fail.
Get ready to learn.
Get ready to keep going.
And if you want support while you do — that’s where coaching belongs.
Not after you’ve figured it all out.
But right in the middle of becoming who you’re meant to be.
